"I loathe people
who keep dogs. They are cowards who haven't
got the guts to bite people themselves." - August Strindberg
DOGS
VS. COMPUTERS
Man's
Best Friend?
- Favorite Food
- Dogs: kibbles
- Computers: bits
Method used to end undesirable behavior
- Dogs: hit with rolled up newspaper
- Computers: hit control-alt-delete
After destruction of personal property
- D: dog not found
- C: file not found
Favorite trick
- D: roll over
- C: play dead
Comic-page hero
- D: Dogbert
- C: Dilbert
Fun way to mess with their heads
- D: peanut butter on roof of mouth
- C: peanut butter in CD-ROM drive
Consequence of virus
- D: replace valuable carpeting
- C: replace valuable data
Widely ignored government mandate
- D: leash law
- C: Communications Decency Act
Waste disposal tool
- D: pooper-scooper
- C: uninstaller (necessary only on Win-tel machines!)
Sensitive internal procedures
- D: must be undertaken by fully qualified professional
- C: may be undertaken by that guy at work who fixed "one kind-of like this" once
Method of marking territory
- D: lifting leg
- C: "Designed for Windows '98"
Unique behavior
- D: lick and drag
- C: click-and-drag
Inexplicable physical feature
- D: dewclaw
- C: scroll lock key
Estimated lifespan
- D: 12 years
- C: 12 months
At end of useful life
- D: euthanasia
- C: tax deduction
You dog lovers out there (I already know you're a computer lover, or you wouldn't be reading this!) will relate to these. If you can think of additions, send them to animals@laughalot.com and I'll add them in.
- Compiled by Laughalot-owner@laughalot.com!
- Original Source Unknown
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